Losing yourself in a relationship doesn’t feel good. This is why our avoidant parts show up: To protect ourselves from losing ourselves. I was there-- wanting connection, but not knowing how to connect without losing myself— and being overwhelmed by my partners...
Nobody likes facing their shadows. These darker parts of ourselves are buried in a ton of shame. Even though we get into relationships to connect, love, and build a home that feels safe and secure, without the right healing work, and lack of skills developed,...
Alicia, in tears, was wrestling with feelings of failure over her healing journey. The setbacks felt overwhelming, like all her progress had crumbled in an instant. She was drowning in self-judgment, unable to shake the guilt of her anxious attachment resurfacing. ...
This is a note for women who are frustrated with the men they are with (or seem to attract— wondering if all men are “weak”.) Avoidant, weak men. Never in a million years would I have imagined writing an email like this. I’m a retired Chiropractor by training,...
I want to introduce you to Denise. Maybe you can relate to her story. "I am in a relationship that I am unhappy in, my partner doesn't even like me, let alone love me. He is always looking for something else, someone else, someone better, someone who will...
Jennifer was unable to have a successful, peaceful, secure romantic relationship without allowing her anxieties and insecurities to sabotage it and push her partner away. She has an anxious attachment style- constantly needing reassurance, constantly struggling with...
I just spoke to a woman stuck in indecision.She has been 8 years in a situationshipwith an avoidant who pulls away when things get close,then when she’s ready to move on,he comes on strong again. Every month for the last 8 years. The thing she hated the most about her...
“Dr. Nima, we walk on eggshells with each other.I am so sensitive to the slightest upset that when he is in a bad mood, I don’t know how to fix it.I constantly feel like a failure in this relationship. Can you help?” I just received this email from a subscriber, and...
When you’re reading about relationshipsand secure attachments, avoidants get thrown under the bus. As I unpacked my last relationship which was definitely a Trauma Bond,I had to take ownership of my avoidance behaviors and find the root cause. I didn’t want to go...
