An observation I’ve made in a growing number of people consuming content about attachment,trauma bonding, codependency, and relationship healing. Even MY content.“I listen to their relationship podcast.”“I’ve read all the books on attachment.”“I binge-watch your...
There’s no shortage of complaints about how men show up in relationships. We fear what we don’t understand. Most men don’t understand women. (And most women don’t understand men.) From a very young age, we ALSO get so many mixed messages. Be a man, don’t show...
He’s watching me. He can feel my energy.He knows when I’m upset. And he can feel when there is tension between me and his mother. He’s learning. He’s observing my reactions. My language.My tone of voice. He’s watching how we speak to one another.How we react to one...
Did you ever wonder why the push-pull dynamic keeps coming upin insecure relationship dynamics? It all makes perfect sense when you study the mechanism. Insecure (and exhausting) push-pull dynamics happen becausewe haven’t yet learned how to navigate the two primary...
Unless you had unicorn parents, chances are that you follow a combination of two primary insecure attachment styles: Anxious (Ambivalent)— Think of a wave who constantly needs connection. Avoidant (Dismissive)— Think of an “island” who needs space. or a...
"It isn't normal to know what we want.It is a rare and difficult psychological achievement.” ― Abraham Maslow I remember it feeling like a panic in my system. I was in a crossroads of my life, wondering what’s next, and when someone asked me what I wanted, my...
Have you heard the Taylor Swift song “Anti-Hero”? I remember the first time hearing it and was blown away. “I’ll stare directly in the sun but never in the mirror” was one of my favorite lines of all time in a song, because it captured what I see so often when...
Imagine it was 40 years ago. And your parents were about to make an important decision. They were sitting on an opportunity to help them heal a part of themselves. They were on the precipice of deciding if NOW is the time to resolve some of their childhood wounding....
“It’s too late for me” is something I’ve been hearing quite a bit in my worldof relationship / Trauma bonding recovery. It’s sad to hear— especially when there’s a more empowering perspective there. We all want secure relationships, and if you’re a parent, of coursewe...
