In all the years helping folks healing from Trauma Bonds,
I learned two very shocking facts:
1) We are facing an epidemic of people who have exes who they label as “narcissists”.
2) Almost every single person I’ve ever met with who labels their ex as a narcissist,
has massive blind spots that I am able to spot in them. There’s a narcissistic shadow in them they can’t see,
or they are denying is there (which is exactly what most narcissists do— they would never admit it).
How do I know?
Easy. MY EX IS A NARCISSIST!!!
In all certainty, my ex gf has 8/9 traits of Borderline Personality Disorder,
with obvious covert narcissistic traits.
I survived leaving the relationship barely with my life and reputation intact.
Even though I’m joking a little bit right now,
the recovery for this process wasn’t easy.
So if you identify with your ex being a narcissist,
just know I see you.
Other than doing my research to study the behaviors to understand her better,
to help let myself off the hook, to know that all the gaslighting they were doing
was coming from a place of their own lack of self worth and need for control…
And it’s important to acknowledge your pain,
staying there and labelling them only keeps you stuck in a loop.
Especially if you have no choice to keep them in your life.
I was blessed to not have any children with my ex.
But many folks who dm me looking for guidance through their trauma bonds,
ask me about what to do if they have to co-parent with their ex who has those traits.
I’m going to suggest you learn a skill
that got me to the next level of healing— completely able to dissolve all my charges on her
This skill is a skill most narcissists are unable to learn.
But if you’re able to master it,
not only can you confirm that you’re NOT the narcissist in the relationship,
but the person you once labelled and edified as a monster,
no longer has power over you,
And their opinion of you no longer has the power
to distract you from your sense of self worth.
It’s a skill that is required if you want to move on and create what it is that you really want:
That skill is:
Your ability to see yourself in them.
Your ability to own your own narcissistic traits, in your own form.
We all have a “Donald Trump” within us who’s got narcissistic traits.
If you can’t see it or own it in yourself— you’ll be super triggered when you see it in others.
When you own it in yourself, not only does it stop you from feeling so victimized by the other person,
your self worth starts to increase in a weird way.
That’s the nature of owning and integrating your shadow parts.
So whether the issue is co-parenting with someone who is toxic,
or you are wanting to learn how to elevate your self worth
so that you can finally have the courage to no longer tolerate anything less than high value love,
if you want to keep elevating your magnetism by learning how to create safety with yourself and others,
I’m ready to meet you and your shadows there.
This is exactly what the Overview Experience zoom event is all about.
Picture taking 6 hours to learn how to dissolve self abandonment, break free from trauma bonds,
heal co-dependency, and upgrade your self worth so that you can turn anxious attachment patterns into secure love.
When you do, you no longer need to give your power away to someone else.
You claim it for yourself and you magnetize that kind of love back to you.
On December 16th we have only 10 spots for couples who are stuck in the “should I stay or go” dynamic,
or people who are wanting to heal an attachment wound from a breakup and upgrade who they are on the other side of it.
First 5 to register get an 1-1 integration call with me to help complete your experience and set the vision for your
secure relationship to flourish, free from the narcissistic / codependent cycle.
Your wingman on the adventure,