Who do I have to be in order to get your approval?
Who do I have to be in order to prevent you from getting upset?
These are our unconscious drives that motivate “fawning."
I did a little skit on how this trauma response shows up in the dating world.
The response has been overwhelming.
From people making fun of how sexy I look as a woman,
to people saying “that was me in my 20’s”.
Check it out here if you haven’t seen it yet.
As playful as we can be about the topic—
The reason why it’s important to be speaking about
is because we all want to have relationships that are secure
where we can be real and take off the mask.
Where we aren’t living with codependency and trauma bonds.
And when we get stuck in toxic relationship dynamics,
we often want the other person to make changes so we can feel loved.
But the blind spot is that most people look outside for the right person
or for changes to take place,
not realizing that they are living with the MOST INSIDIOUS trauma response
that’s literally paralyzing any chance of living with a fulfilling secure relationship.
And it’s not too late to learn how to shift it.
I know you probably hate feeling insecure in relationships
anxiously wanting more connection with an avoidant,
or wanting connection but feeling overwhelmed/ consumed with the responsibility,
constantly performing to be approved of or avoid displeasing someone.
Fawning is a form of unconscious manipulation,
which breeds a lack of trust.
One of my clients said she doesn’t trust men,
only to realize she’s been fawning so much
that if a man were to buy into her bullshit—
there’s no way she could trust him!
Turns out— She didn’t trust herself.
She’s now begun making the shifts,
and is blown away by how men are responding.
Healing the fawning response makes you sexy AF.
When I say it’s not too late, I mean it—
today from 4-7pm PST (7-10 EST)
or 11am Sydney time I’m doing my 3 hour masterclass called:
From People Pleasing to Powerful: How to stop fawning and start flourishing in relationships.
it’s only $25 and the replay will be up for 48 hours after before it’s taken down.
Last call if you want to learn how to take off the mask
and turn "manipulative performance” into a life of integrity
where you become a safe container where secure relationships can thrive,
and magnetic as f*ck.
Your wingman on the adventure,
Nima.
