Reality Check

Written By Dr. Nima

On December 9, 2022

If you’re basing your future on your partner changing and you’re waiting / hoping for them to get some sort of therapy to become more emotionally available to you….

A good check in right now before the holiday season starts…..



I have had to bite my lip several times in the last few weeks talking to people who simply refuse to look at the glaring truth of their situation — -completely unaware of the power and influence they keep giving away.

Here’s what it looks like.

Step 1) person complains that their partner isn’t showing up for them.

Step 2) person becomes aware that their partner is treating them to the same degree of respect and admiration they are showing themselves — as informed by their childhood woundings.

Step 3) they realize the reflection — but still carry on about how their partner doesn’t take on responsibility. After all- “what’s the point of me doing all the work if they won’t?”


Both parties in the relationship can be overweight and unhealthy.

Ideally both parties wake the f** up and get healthy together….

But what happens when your partner doesn’t?

How can you “get them to”?

By getting healthy yourself and realizing you will no longer tolerate being with someone who can’t pull their own weight.

By having them see you living well and becoming inspired to.

It’s time we stopped using our partners as scapegoats critiquing them through a magnifying glass and started looking at them as mirrors and seeing our own reflections and going INSIDE first.

If we don’t, we will forever be “waiting” and giving our power and life force energy away.

When we do, we form the foundation of secure love and deep trust and intimacy — — because we have found it for OURSELVES.

I’m so stoked to be guiding the peeps of our Cyclebreakers community through the Overview Experience next Saturday December 17th — just before the mad rush of the holidays.

We are opening 15 spots for guests who aren’t in our Cyclebreakers portal/collective communities to jump in and join.
As an added bonus, all the guests will receive an integration call after the event to help process everything that came up and help set the path moving forward to apply what was learned so that you feel safer in your body, more confident and secure in your boundaries, and open to receive the goodness you’ve been unconsciously pushing away due to a sense of a “lack of deserving”.

Check in:
What part of you needs the most growth in 2023?

Jump in with the link and join us — and let me know what you’d love to focus on in the intake form and I’ll be sure to include it in the training.

Dr. Nima


Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You May Also Like…

Why Affairs are so Intoxicating (and P*rn too)

You find a partner. You fall in love. You have good enough s€x to want to keep them around. (not necessarily in that order?) And then it happens.An affair. Or some version of infidelity. I realize that reading this might feel uncomfortable for you.But if we truly...

read more

Rewire -Trauma, Sex And Money – It’s All Related

Inevitably on the path towards healing our relationship dynamics, there comes a time when we are called to wake up, put down the magnifying glass, and pick up a mirror instead.   Sadly, many who are on the road to recovery haven’t even gotten there yet. They’re the...

read more

My ex husband was my first s€xual partner

(4 minute read) QUESTION IN MY DM’S: I'm a 38 year old woman, and I got divorced last year after being separated for several years.My ex-husband was my first s€xual partner.The s€x was better prior to getting married,but after our first year of marriage it was...

read more