Bossbabe Conundrum

Written By Dr. Nima

On May 4, 2023
Just had an interesting back and forth with a woman who was keen on working with me.
 
Here’s her story:
My story dates back to my early childhood years where I grew up in a dysfunctional emotionally and physically abusive household. Typical Mediterranean strict father with lots of emotional issues. My abandonment issues stem from the lacking of emotional parenting I had access to. My father left us off and on during my entire childhood. My mother always working to survive and get ahead as am immigrant was not accessible but she too was not the most emotional being either. My mother spent most of her life fighting with my father and taking all the abuse to survive. I was witness to physical abuse towards her, my sister and sometimes me. While my parents were always there for us and provided good values it was in a very toxic and manipulative environment. We never knew when my father would get upset or leave us for days or months. We walked on eggshells all the time. I was ignored because I was the good kid in the family the responsible one and the one who had the least demands and caused the least trouble. Ironically I look at myself today compared to my two sisters and I am the least cared for today by my partner. The least taken care of financially and emotionally and by far the least secure in life. I do everything for myself and no one to depend on. No one has ever stepped up to the plate for me and wanted to give his all. Even in my marriage there were conditions… prenup, detachment and constant holding back love to manipulate. I am 52 years old and I feel broken. I am always thinking why am I not good enough for the people I love? Why do I keep entering the same patterns? Why can’t I walk away from those who can’t give me what I want? Why am I so emotionally dependent? Why can’t I be like everyone else? I see all kinds of woman with devoted partners … and even if they are unhappy today at some point that man chose that woman happily to enter in that free commitment? Why don’t I deserve that? Why won’t someone choose me and do whatever it takes to have me? And more importantly why don’t I make good choices and insist to be treated properly? I’ve gone from one bad relationship to another. Engaged once… married once…in an extramarital affair whom I thought he had left his wife but never did.. and now today in a relationship with a man I adore most but just can’t get there for me. I did to stop this pattern. Either I am selecting all the wrong people or I am doing something wrong myself and right now I can only fix myself.”
 
This all sounds great doesn’t it.
Who wouldn’t want to heal and receive the devoted love of a man who’s in his masculine energy wanting to make her a priority?
Our back and forth interaction revealed the exact reason why her relationships are the way they are.
I saw it clearly.
And After speaking to several women in this community who are stuck in the same situation..
I thought it was important to share a massive this massive blind spot revealed so that you can open the door to solving it, and have masculine men wanting to CLAIM you.

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