DEAR PEOPLE PLEASER IN RECOVERY,
it’s not your fault that you are wearing a mask.
Growing up, if you’ve ever been punished or scolded for your authentic self expression,
it makes perfect sense why you might want to hide certain aspects of yourself.
The problem is, this is a double edged sword,
as it will without a doubt cause destruction to your intimate relationships.
The people who reach out for guidance on their relationship dynamics,
wondering if they should stay or go,
hungry for relationships that feel secure,
all have a humbling moment at our Overview Experience
when I take them through the mastery of the most important skill they never learned:
How to take an emotional trigger that comes up in their relationship,
and, instead of abandoning themselves, turn it into deeper self love,
and turning the conflict itself into something that can create deeper intimacy.
As they are learning how to shift their relationship dynamics and become magnetic to
secure love by expanding their self worth, they all realize the same thing:
Even though they feel unseen, unheard, and disconnected in their relationships,
it was THEMSELVES they abandoned long before their partner ever did.
This humbling realization, while it isn’t their FAULT, becomes an inspiring responsibility to heal.
Without healing the root cause of this self abandonment,
we become “unconsciously empathetic” to others— fawning, people pleasing, and rescuing,
at the cost of their own emotional, mental, and physical well-being.
I say it’s not your fault, because if you look closely, you’ll notice that this pattern began when you were little,
where you were validated and celebrated when you sacrificed your own well being to please others.
It almost forms an identity where you become a magnet for those who will take advantage of it.
Then you end up resenting THEM, hoping that by over-giving, the tables will one day turn,
and you’ll have a chance to receive.
And that day never comes.
If you can relate to this, and you’re wanting to learn how to expand your empathetic container
to FIRST INCLUDE YOURSELF, this is exactly what learning how to become a CycleBreaker is all about.
Every month, I have a 6 hour intensive virtual retreat where as a community, we break these cycles
that began in childhood so that our children don’t grow up in the same pattern,
and learn how to love themselves by the EXAMPLE we lead, not just lip-service.
This event is for our community members ONLY, but every month,
I open up the space for 10 souls ready to break that cycle
and learn how to be:
and Unapologetically living their values, but with empathy…
so that they can master the art of secure relationships and navigate conflict and repair artfully.
To grab one of our last 3 spots, for our upcoming date on August 26th from noon-6pm PST (3-9 EST)
or Sunday morning from 5-11am in Oz, jump in and fill out the form describing exactly what your back story is,
and what you want to accomplish.
For those last 3 spots— what’s included is a 1-1 Integration session with me afterwards where I help answer
any remaining question so that you make sure you get your intentions met.
If you’re ready to break the cycle of people pleasing and showing up as insecure in your relationships, waiting to be chosen,
constantly wanting love but feeling like you’re sabotaging it when it comes…
Tell me what you want to accomplish and I’ll show you the roadmap to get there.
We can’t do it alone, and no one can do it for us.
See you on the other side.